This morning was my final run before the marathon. I didn't know how far I was going to go until I got out there. There were too many things on my mind that I decided not to do a full 6 miles. Besides, it was frickin' cold out there. Frost covered the cars and the grass was brittle. I felt kind of tight, and a little strange. All of the training is now at an end. The final exam is on Sunday.
I've received a lot of nice notes from people... emails, cards and a hilarious phone call from Marsick. It was overwhelming, in a sense. Overwhelming in a good sense. I almost lost my cool tonight when I got home from work and put on some Springsteen for the kids. Some of those songs that carried me through the training, especially the emotional ones from "The Rising", it really got to me for the first time since the concert with Budd back in August. (I know, I know... Spingsteen again? Give it a rest Malchus).
The bags are all packed and Jules and I have that nervous energy we get before traveling. I'm very excited about the trip, but very neurotic about the marathon on Sunday. (What? Scott neurotic? No. Never.)
At this point I'm not even surer who is reading this journal. I've become a little self-conscious about it and I don't think I'm giving it my best writing. Then again, I've been a little scatter brained all week. When I reflect on what everything means, this marathon and the fundraising, I feel pretty proud of myself. I'm most proud of how much money was raised.
That's a butt load of money boys and girls.
Still, I keep feeling like it's not enough. If I could breakthrough and start making movies on a regular basis, using whatever clout I might attain to help fight CF, that would maybe be enough. Someday, perhaps. Let's hope.
For any of you still reading this mindless blathering, I plan to keep a journal for the week we're in Hawaii. I figure to close down this blog right after the holidays, when we celebrate Sophie's birthday. That way, we'll cover almost all of the important holidays in our lives. Perhaps I'll do an update when Julie's birthday rolls around in May. That would be a nice epilogue.
That's all for now. We rise up at 4:00 in the morning and venture down to LAX. It's going to be a long morning, but the payoff is we get into Hawaii and it will only be lunchtime. How cool is that.
Until I return, God bless us, every one of us! And all of you folks tat helped raise the money. God bless you, too.